Why I Got Married [french toast]

Because you were all wondering, right?

I knew it.

The biggest reason I got married was so that my husband could forever capture my most awkward moments using his phone.

Like when he put a box on my head because I was getting a little too carried away while preparing to move.

Or when I sat down to do some work in the middle of a parking lot.

Or when I took a minute to lecture him about something he messed up in the kitchen.

I’m so glad I’ll always have these memories.

The second biggest reason I married my husband is because in doing so, I became Jennifer Lopez.

Yep.  I did.

And the third biggest reason I married him is because he makes a mean French toast.

Made even better by my homemade brioche (though he will tell you it’s not as good as challah bread) and some local Hickory syrup.

I make a mean pancake, but I’ve never made edible French toast.  I order it almost every time I go out to brunch for exactly that reason.

Thus, when I met a man who made the best French toast ever, I knew I had found a keeper.

After making a batch this Sunday, my husband was insistent that the French toast I’ve enjoying in stealth for nine (nine!) years needed its moment in the sun.  And dear readers, it’s 100% blog-worthy.  Not too heavily battered, with an nice crunch on the outside, and that elusive golden-brown color that food stylists long for, this is French toast at it’s best.  No greasy spoon needed.

Except there’s one problem.  He doesn’t know how he makes it.

He swears there’s no recipe, he makes French toast by sight alone.

“Husband!” I tell him, “CV is going to want to make this for breakfast, so I need measurements.  I need cooking times!”

“Tell people it’s a recipe for guys.  You just do it, and you get French toast.”

Again, I pleaded my case with him.  “This doesn’t really sound like it should go up on the blog.”

“Look, I cook semi-less-than-frequently, and people need to know I have my moments and I’m really good at some things.”

Fair enough.

Dear readers, my husband cooks semi-less-than-frequently, and you need to know that he does bring something to the table.  He brings French toast.  The recipe for which isn’t nearly as Type-A as I’d like it to be, but that speaks volumes about the balance in our relationship.  I’m neurotic, and he’s laid back.  I’ve learned to roll with it.

This, dear readers, is my best translation of a from the heart recipe.

“2 eggs, that’s what I know for sure,” he begins (has this guy been watching Oprah?), and so it continues.

To make French Toast for two, you will need:

  • 2 eggs
  • 1 C of milk, any kind (He thinks.  You don’t even want to know how long we discussed the amount he puts in the mixing bowl and how that might translate to a measuring cup.)
  • 1 splash vanilla (You’d think he cooks for real.  I’m going to call it a tsp.)
  • 2 pinches cinnamon (Let’s say 1/2 tsp.)
  • 4-6 slices of bread, the thicker the dough, the better
  • 1 T butter for the pan

Whisk eggs, milk, vanilla and cinnamon together in a medium bowl.  Heat the butter over a griddle or skillet on a medium flame.  While the butter is melting, dip the first slice of bread in the egg mixture, and let it soak for 10 seconds (no more than 15).  Flip the slice and let sit for another 10 seconds.  Put the slice of bread on the hot pan and leave it for 30 seconds to1 minute, depending on the thickness of the bread.  You want a nice, golden brown color on one side.  Using a spatula, flip the bread over and repeat on the other side until you get your desired color.

My husband is adamant that you not develop a rotation in which you get one slice soaking while the other is cooking.  He tells me he devotes 100% of his love and care to the slice at hand.  Leave your finished sliced on a warm plate (he never uses a 200 degree oven, which I might be inclined to do) while you attend to your next little gem. As the butter in the skillet runs low, add small pats as necessary.  You may also need to turn the flame down as you continue.

Serve with syrup, and love, drizzled all over.

7 thoughts on “Why I Got Married [french toast]

  1. Best post of AGOM history. Tell Husband I will not be making his recipe anytime soon, as I need strict instructions in the kitchen. Let’s pencil in a date for me to try this delicious dish though 🙂

  2. Thank Husband for me. I will ATTEMPT this weekend as I have limited French toast success; however, next time we have a sleep over, let’s make him wake up and fix this 🙂

    (on a different note, how’s that for punctuation?)

  3. K, I answered my own question using the handy Search bar you have up there. I still want Husband to make this for me next time I sleep over (too bad I didn’t plan that for tonight!); and his recipie sounds like what I do, but maybe it takes a guys touch… Ill tr that reasoning out on Adam and see how far i get. Also, I have poor bread choosing skills.

  4. Pingback: You Make It, You Own It [slow cooker nutella french toast casserole] | a glass of milk

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