On Feeling Settled

Dear Readers, we have been setting up camp in our house, in one form or another, since June 1.  And I haven’t really had anyone over yet.  Some friends have popped by in that, if you’re in the neighborhood, kind of way, but I have yet to pull out all the stops and really truly host people.

first meal.

When we moved into our last house, we had a housewarming party a mere three weeks after we got there.  Three weeks!  I’m coming up on 4 months with nothing to show for it. I felt so guilty about this, not because anyone was banging down my door, saying, “Invite me now,” but because what 30-something year old lady doesn’t throw heaps of guilt on herself for things that would seem trivial to people with rational minds?

chaos.

But yesterday, I achieved clarity.  And thus, I have learned another secret of life.  You can’t compare things, even if those things seem like the same things.  Deep, no?  I moved into a house 5 years ago.  I moved into a house 4 months ago.  As they were not the same house, nor is my life going on under the same circumstances, I cannot expect the same things to happen in the second house that happened in the first.  The first house was move-in ready.  We unpacked our boxes and did not need to do so much as paint.  So of course we had people over right away.  We had nothing else to do!  This house still has a to-do list about a mile long.  There’s a living room rug we’re waiting on the next credit card cycle to buy.  There are three rooms to paint.  There are light fixtures that haven’t even been decided yet.  So it doesn’t feel ready.

construction.

None of those things will be in place in a couple of Fridays, when I open up my doors to some of my favorite people, but I feel ready for them anyway.  For one, the things we already have in the house are almost all in place.  Think pictures on the wall, books on shelves, and sheets on the beds.  And for another, I feel settled.  We moved in in June, moved our stuff in in July, promptly ran off to the beach, then came back as I was gearing up for work to start again.  But now I’m getting into the swing of things.  I had the day off today, and crossed some menial tasks off the list, and I realized I feel settled in our home now.  The house feels like ours, now that I’ve had space and time to myself in it.

closet explosion.

This is a long, rambling way to a) cheer myself on, and b) let you, dear readers, know that you have permission to take the time you need to do whatever you need, whenever you need it.  With love from a thirty-something year old lady.

3 thoughts on “On Feeling Settled

  1. Two Fridays from now? My invitation must have gotten lost in the mail. And I’m so glad you are now handling your own menial tasks and are no longer assigning them to SCL! 🙂

  2. i don’t have everything on our walks yet. I actually need to take out some screws and anchors, patch, and then decide what I’m hanging in certain places. And we’re trying to figure out where yo put boxes so we can set up our desk. So much to do!!

    Enjoy your get together!!

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