I’m Rolling My Eyes at Myself [slow cooker ketchup]

I don’t want to say that I’m a food snob.  I try really hard not to be.  But this one time, I needed ketchup, and I was at Whole Foods, and they don’t have non-snobby ketchup.  So I bought snobby ketchup.  And when I say snobby, I mean some organic ketchup that had way more flavor than regular ketchup, and I didn’t put it on regular old hot dogs, but I put it on things where I could really taste the difference and where it felt fancy.

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And then my husband and I were perusing The Kitchn’s slow cooker archives, and we saw slow cooker ketchup.  He got really excited about it, and he gets really excited about so few things, so we added it to the menu.

It’s truly amazing.

And now I’m going to be that person who only uses the fancy homemade ketchup that she made.

I put it on tater tots, so you know I’m not that fancy.  Tater tots are the best vehicle for ketchup.

To make a batch, you will need:

  • 1 (28-ounce) can crushed tomatoes
  • 1/2 small onion, diced
  • 1/2 cup apple cider vinegar
  • 1/4 cup packed brown sugar
  • 2 teaspoons kosher salt
  • 1 teaspoon paprika
  • 1/2 teaspoon black pepper
  • 1/2 teaspoon celery seed
  • Pinch ground allspice

Put everything in the slow cooker.  Cook it on low, uncovered, for 6 or 7 hours.  Puree everything with an immersion blender or food processor.  (I let mine cool completely before I processed, but you don’t have to.)  Serve with whatever makes your heart sing.  People put ketchup on the strangest foods.

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